the 1001st time | love, loss

| the 1001st time |


What’s it like, falling in love for the first time?

Asks he who’s fallen in love thrice before

He takes my hand in his

Hands that know so well the weight of another

I’ve fallen in love maybe a thousand times before

With witty banter and passerby

With featherlight fingers and drowsy kiss

I’ve fallen in love with outlines and ideas

Always moments but never a man

Never blood and bone

Never bliss after burning bliss

I know not a first-time love

And maybe I’ll fall in love a thousand times once more

But never a love that felt so whole

Never a love that felt like this


| love, loss |


The halves that halve you in half – 

A line I’d heard in a movie once

(I never quite understood it until you came along)

You didn’t mean it, I don’t think,

When you carved into me

Severed blood-muscle and artery

Down into my very bones

I thought I’d be able to rip you from my skin

As swiftly as you’d entered me

Extract you from my mind and muscle memory

Tempered emotions and one clean cut

Instead you leave behind:

Saliva and skin cells – traces underneath my fingernails

Kisses embedded in my skin like shrapnel

Be still, my jagged dagger heart

Against my better judgement

I loved you with unguarded eagerness

And cradled your face between unsteady hands

Mild winter turned to dusty spring

Come summer you’ll be gone

(Too late for an easy leave)

Maybe, one day, in a faraway fall

We’ll meet once again on a faraway bridge

Standing hand in unsteady hand

You trade your gory bits for mine

Flanked on both sides by rusted locks

Behind us, a sky ablaze with bleeding trees


*Inspired by the poem from the movie Like Crazy (2011)

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One thought on “the 1001st time | love, loss

  1. Pingback: I, too | Meganhana

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